I have always loved learning and inventing languages. Actually, I’m obsessed with it. It’s not merely language, but a deep and intense passion for storytelling: stories, the media they take, and the tools used to make them. My passion for this is so great, that even in my darkest hours, I have been compelled to read and write, especially in computer languages. Writing has saved my life in the past by serving as a medium through which I could gain perspective over my experiences, some of which have been deeply transformational, but it is through writing software specifically that I realized the power of computer systems to influence our thinking, and dictate how and what we share with one another. I also realized my ability to influence those systems, and my calling to reform them into something more humanistic.

Language is the fundamental technology of our society, the medium on which we articulate and communicate models of the phenomena of our world. The impact of computers on this society to accelerate and expand communication across the globe also can not be overstated, and so the language of computers is at least as fundamental to the globalization of society, as natural language is to the formation of society itself. I have taught myself many computer languages, from a child in the fourth grade, studying C++ from a textbook my Father had given me, to a high-schooler, writing programs in BASIC on my calculator to compute my math homework, til today: even as I write this essay, on a computer with a user-interface that I have configured partly using software that I wrote myself, I am contemplating current and yet-unbegun projects, that I plan to return to after I have submitted my college application. These include a Virtual Machine of my own design, in which I plan to further experiment with language implementation; a Personal Information Management system that a friend has asked me to develop to help him digitize his paper notes; and my web server, which I am eager to update with my latest explorations in science fiction, software, art, and poetry. These technologies have the potential to enrich the stories I and my friends are able to tell, and that excites me. However, despite everything I have been able to teach myself, I can see that it is time now for me to pursue a formal education at Bard College, so that I will not only have access to more complete and quality education in the form of instructors, facilities, and tutors, who can offer specialized support on this very specific topic of computer science, but also the opportunity to grow and collaborate with peers on the same path.

As language is the medium for communication, stories are the fundamental unit of information in our society. They are the components upon which we build our mental map of the world, from which we form our relationships, and the means by which we communicate to others our understanding, or ask for information on what we don’t understand. The effect of stories on our psyche is not of merely academic interest, either. The kinds of stories that we come to believe are the same that we learn to accept and repeat. They affect the quality of our relationships, and through them, how supported we are in life. It’s "garbage in, garbage out," as far as our brains are concerned, and so a part of the pathway to improving our lives is through improving our means of writing, sharing, and critiquing stories. Software is only one aspect of that path, but thanks to my unique characteristics, it is one that I feel particularly adapted to working in. My own story is one which speaks a great deal of suffering caused by miscommunication and the disruption of my community. My parents could not figure out how to fit me into their world view, and could not foster healthy relationships with each other or others. I was raised in split custody, with one household defined by emotional abuse, and the other by emotional absence, in a school system that wouldn’t accept me as an outsider of color, a child with autism and ADHD. I had no place that felt like home, no one to reach out to for support or guidance, and as a minor, no agency of my own, so I consigned myself to my computer. It was my accommodating place, the place where I had agency, I had protection, and I could make it anything I wanted. It was a traumatic time during which I escaped by engaging with the fantasy story of finding freedom on the net, a story which saved me from the worst of the danger from my childhood, but which handicapped me as an adult, and limited the depth and quality of relationships I would develop for many years. My self-isolation cost me many opportunities, and kept me in a constant battle for survival that culminated in my experience of homelessness in 2022/23. However, rather than let it callous me, by reflecting on my experience through writing prose, poetry and software, I have developed a deeper understanding of my story, and greater compassion for others.

I know that community and human connection are fundamental to the experience of a better life, for myself, or for anyone. I am looking forward to finding that, and growing it with the peers and faculty at Bard. Specifically, it would be my dream to meet people with whom I would start or grow a business which had a positive impact on peoples lives. I believe that the strong resonance between my own unconventional academic path, and Bard’s accessibility initiatives, like the Bard Prison Program, Bard Entrance Examination, and the Bard Baccalaureate, make me an ideal candidate for attendance. My extreme and unusual experiences have bestowed me with a unique cultural and spiritual perspective that draws me to Bard: a place where I can exercise my creative and technical gifts, and their unique character of growth out of poverty will be celebrated rather than suppressed. I aspire to grow stronger communities by improving the technology we’re built upon, and I look forward to making Bard a part of this story.